UFO Mobile

I envy the people who can digitally transform one ordinary UFO ship into a sleek and elegant mobile: reminds me of the girl who was transformed into a queen.. whats here name... o yes, Cinderella.

Watch the modern fairy god-mothers at work:





This one is way old now, but it somehow fitted appropriately in this entry. How a banger like Citroen was changed into a dancing robot! Now why would I want a car, that likes to dance... what were they thinking!!!

What is love?

UPDATED:

Just could not resist the humour in this incredible love story:


More updates...

What did the orange do, when the lemon of his life left him for the grapefruit?

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Always Maxi pads

This is a letter from an Austin woman sent to American company Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph.

FYI, PC Magazine’s 2007 editors’ choice for best web mail-award-winning letter.

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your ‘Always’ maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the Leak Guard Core or Dry-Weave absorbency, I’d probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I’d certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favourite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can’t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there’s a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse’? I’m guessing you haven’t. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I’ll be transformed into what my husband likes to call an inbred hillbilly with knife skills. Isn’t the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, Mr. Thatcher, you’ve no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from ‘Aunt Flo’. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control, maniacal behaviour.

You surely realize it’s a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend’s testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey’s Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy! The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants…

Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: ‘Have a Happy Period.’

Are you fucking kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager male brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness - is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you’re some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything ‘happy’ about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don’t march down to the local Walgreen’s armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out of your ass, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ‘Put down the Hammer’ or ‘ Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’, or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bullshit. And that’s a promise I will keep. Always.

Best, Wendi Aarons
Austin, TX

Not that I would know anything about the emotions she’s describing. Nope, not me.

No, siree.

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My resignation as an adult

I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of a 5 year old again.

* I want to go to McDonald's and think that it is a four star restaurant.
* I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples in a pond with rocks.
* I want to think M&M's are better than money because you can eat them.
* I want to lie under a big oak tree and watch the ants march up its trunk.
* I want to run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.
* I want to go fishing and care more about catching the minnows along the shore than the big bass in the lake.
* I want to think the world is fair.
* I want to return to a time when life was simple. When all I knew about were colours, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes. When I didn't know what I know now. When all I knew was to be happy because I was blissfully unaware of all the things that should make me worried.
* I want to think that a penny is worth more than a five pound note because it is prettier and weighs more.
* I want to think that everyone is honest and good. I want to believe that anything is possible.
* I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things in life again.
* I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, dreams, the imagination, the Tooth Fairy, a kiss that makes a boo-boo go away, making angels in the snow, and that my dad and G-d are the strongest people in the world.

So......here's my checkbook and my car keys, my credit cards and the bills, my P60's and SA100 statements, my stocks and bonds, my collections, my insurance premiums, my job, my house and the payments, my e-mail address, pager, cell phone, computer, and watch. I am officially resigning from adulthood. And if you want to discuss this with me further, you'll have to catch me cause........

tag! You're it!

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My dil goes mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... (part drei)

My dearest No-longer Girlfriend,

It's 03:01 am out here and while you must in sweet slumber dreaming of your happy future with your new partner I must have read and re-read all the emails that we have exchanged over the past two years.. some nice, long and romantic and some pretty much boring one-liners!

But as I looked back upon those moments and ponder on each word that you had written, on each alphabet - I remember the moments when you and I shared in a spirit of love. The bond of affection far beyond the realms of definitions which was there - alas no longer exists. I stare at all your pictures that slide before me and listen to all the tracks that you have dedicated to me... but all that remains is me all alone. Call it what you may, but this is the irony of life.

Today incidently also happens to be the third anniversary of the My dil goes mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... series of letters, and though you are no longer by my side.. you will always remain in my heart. Bloody hell, you 5'1" girl... somehow you climbed and stole my heart away.... and I'll always Love you for that!

I recall the moments spent with you all the while trying to make sense of what happened and what I could have done to have prevented this day where I am all so lonely and helpless....

I guess you have finally succeeded in weakening the cold heart of mine, making a fool of me and destroying my reasons. You have in one big swoop turned turned my world all topsy-turvy.

Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible fate that a man can ever face. I was incomplete , miserable and a sorry ass without you. And sadly I am not better today. Such is the circle of life, I guess.

But sad story aside, I am just so glad and feel so blessed that I could share even a few precious moments with you - probably the best time of my life! I know I still may not know how to show how much I love and care for you, but jaan trust me, you are my jaan! I just don't know how I will be able to live without you being in my life anymore. How will my mornings, my afternoons and my nights be without you - just one eclipse after the another...

Not one night passes when I may not have dreamed of us being in each others arms, enjoying those lollies that you so much love, walking hand in hand on long stretches of beaches with your laughter echoing in the air around..

How I dream every night of your smell, of your delicate touch and mischievous looks that you give and that heart stopping smile. It just breaks my heart, literally the smile in me just drowns away even by the thought of losing you. I just can't live without you now - you have become my medicine, my drug. You have become my addiction. And I just cannot break free of you.

My dil goes crazy, in a deep mesmerizing frenzy just thinking of you. I look for the syllables of your name in every word that I read, see your face in every window. I miss you very much with each passing breath.

Words are meaningless without you, jaan. I cannot write what I feel because I cannot find words that would describe those feelings that I am having for you. I cannot describe the unbearable pain that I am feeling right now, thinking that I am not able to kiss those pink soft lips of yours. I cannot describe the agony right now of not being able to knock on your window so that I could sneak you out of your house for a very late long drive.

We are all born for love...it is the principle existence and it's only end. You are my "a" and you shall be my "z", my only true love!

Jaan, I am trying to continue, but my fingers have given up. My eyes have given up. My heart has given up. How I wish to beg you to be with me. Leave everything and be with me. But I know... why do I have to know! Why can't i be selfish and ruthless and snatch away what is mine?

Jaan, I may be one arse of a person. But I promise ya one thing, wherever and whenever you are happy, I am happy as well! No matter when, how or why you ever need me - jaan, day or night (except when I am in the loo) - you give me howler and I'll be at your service.

"You may be out of my sight, but not out of my heart. "You may be out of my reach, but not out of my mind. "I am always Thinking of You."

Now get your sorry and bony arse up and get on with your new life!

mwaaah!

Only yours forever and ever, till death do us apart...

Office Prank

Its the season of pranks.. well atleast very soon... here's a heads up for April Fools day:

1. On your mark's computer, go to the Desktop and make a new folder.
2. Rename the new folder to e.g. “Porn”
3. Make a screenshot
4. Delete the folder that you’d just created
5. Install the screenshot image as a Desktop wallpaper
6. Enjoy!

Here's another one:



Anyone got any cool pranks.. let me know!

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Sensitivity Training

A friend of mine was sent to a training camp few months back from her company for few months and she was all psyched about it because her dorm was supposed to be co-ed.

Anyhoo, I wonder if the guys at the dorm recieved any sensitivity training for this... in case here's a clip at what normally happens at those sessions anyway... for future trainees:

Sensitivity Training - video powered by Metacafe