O Romeo, where art thou?

When Romeo first laid eyes upon Juliet, their death was imminent. Bard knew it. You and I knew it. Everyone just knew it.

They had to die to be immortal in the hearts of every archetypal of young lovers all over the world. Just who talks of Cinderella or Snow White whenever a great love story has to be told? Ahem! No one does, except maybe only Disney.

Yup, the old fashioned suicide was the only option Romeo & Juliet had – even though they did it not knowing the complete truth – their heart was in the right place. So I guess, it counts.

Then there is always the option to back away out of the picture to let the other live in the perception of happiness. The Indian way.

But this too is totally unacceptable for the success of the immortal story for three reasons:

1. Less dramatic if no one dies. And there is always the remote possibility that they just might meet again some rainy day (and you know rainy days in India are – wet saris and all) – they just start up a grand affair! And that is always bad...
   
2. If one of them decide and did choose to end one’s life (and therefore remove all traces of future adultery) - the guy will eventually kill himself by liver failure due to too much drinking on the girl’s in-laws porch after a 10 minute sad song (...bad again for future happiness and reputation of the girl's character at the in-laws). And in the case of the girl – she would jump off the bridge into the Ganges – which sadly is so polluted now that you might as well die from its pungent smell (apparently cyanide is for the villains only).
3. And let’s say if the Mission ‘S’ was a success, Indian mythology of afterlife would have me believe that one of them might end up alive again as a centipede or something. Ugh! Not to mention a sad ending to a very sad story.
   

But, sadly, I can’t help being an Indian even though I only visited the country on my summer holidays. Never the less, I do not believe in the concept of taking one’s life either. It is only meant for losers and suckers of foolhardy propaganda. Unless of course the Mafia or the CIA (Call It Anything – they’re still crooks as far as I can tell) is on my back – this way I get to chose the most efficient and merciful way out (even though it may be rudimentary). And thankfully since they have no reason to be on my back - sucide is not an option for me.

So, where does that leave me? Hmm.

While I loathe here depressed with my miserable story on the sofa watching reruns of all the romantic tragedies and gorging on “that’s gonna add another 20 kgs” I have a faint hope shimmering somewhere.

Who knows, I just might end up having that affair after all!

TECHNORATI KEYWORDS: A SAD STORY, ME ME ME, DREAMZUNLIMITED, SAJID PATEL